his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
