I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
