I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
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