It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize