Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize