Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
