small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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