My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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