i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
