Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
My breath smells like gin and sadness
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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