I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Just pee around me
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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