so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize