i permit you to call me
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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