I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
