Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
