I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
operation have a gay friend backfired
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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