Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I've blown a few things in my day
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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