ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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