Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
