Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
