Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
