u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
