drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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