Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
