It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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