ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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