I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
