wanna go halves on a baby?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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