dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Four minutes until I can fart!
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Houston, we have a blender
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Randomize
