Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
