In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
