I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
