Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Congratulations! We have a period
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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