the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
