You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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