Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

don't read that magazine bro. I came in it

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(517): View more from Michigan

Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.

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(915): View more from Texas

so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on

(1-915): View more from Texas

who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me

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(509): View more from Washington

They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.

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(214): View more from Texas

Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.

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(226): View more from Ontario

This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex

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(734): View more from Michigan

It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.

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(425): View more from Washington

I just had sex on a roof

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(651): View more from Minnesota

I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.

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