yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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