Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
