Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry JoeBLow hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(732): View more from New Jersey

no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck

Fav 35 1340 6574
share tweet
(631): View more from New York

I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick

Fav 25 1063 4411
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(510): View more from California

i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.

Fav 16 862 4855
share tweet
(661): View more from California

No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.

Fav 44 4805 1317
share tweet
(801): View more from Utah

He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.

Fav 38 1361 5007
share tweet
(617): View more from Massachusetts

it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk

Fav 4 1600 2838
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.

Fav 8 3013 1102
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(619): View more from California

Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.

Fav 0 685 512
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(951): View more from California

He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.

Fav 0 40 8
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT