Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
