it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Randomize
