I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
And then he peed in my hair
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