That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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