its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
