A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
There's even glitter on my cock...
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