I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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