why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize