Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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