I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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