i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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